The Professor's Day of Rest
by EmblemWizard513
Summary: When Professor Byleth decides to rest in his room for the day instead of helping around the monastery, Edelgard sets out to discover why, only to discover what could only to be known as a tale of pure torture. At least, for her anyway. EdelgardxByleth, minor FerdinandxMarianne. Part 2: Seteth hears the other side. It goes about as well as you expect. SetethxLossOfSanity.
1. Chapter 1

**The Professor's Day of Rest**

** So I'm back. For how long, I don't know. We will see. I'm pretty inconsistent as we all know. Now, onto this little gem of a game. Three Houses is probably my favorite FE game of all time now. The characters are wonderful, the story is great, and the gameplay is very well thought out, and it feels like every class is on a (somewhat) equal footing. I've had an idea about this one for a while, and I hope you guys enjoy it. Edelgard quickly became one of my favorite characters, and if you guys like her too, I hope you guys like it. And to you Manuela fans, I'm not bashing; I just find this funny.**

** Also, Ferdi x Mari just works so well in my opinion.**

** Also, SPOILERS, for those that have not played the game.**

** Disclaimer: I don't own Fire Emblem. If I did, the Edelgard route would have been longer. Also, Claude would have had a more active role in the Edelgard route, because Claude is a true bro.**

It was not unusual for Professor Byleth to not go out of his way to help others every Sunday in the Monastery, from returning lost items to treating them to their favorite meals. The reasons given for not helping around would usually be seminars or a request to deal with bandits.

What was unusual was that Professor Byleth chose to rest that day and seclude himself to his room, as announced by Seteth. Of the months that the Imperial Princess knew him, Professor Byleth did not seem like the individual who would just rest instead of doing something. As a matter of fact, Edelgard was almost convinced that something was terribly wrong with him.

Could he finally reached his limit with the students? No that couldn't be it; even if he didn't show much emotion, if any at all, Edelgard could clearly see in his eyes that he enjoyed the company of his students in the Black Eagles. Hell, he even managed to recruit students from other houses to join theirs, for which Edelgard appreciated dearly.

Did the recent battle take toll on him? No, it couldn't be that. Although the canyon was full of demonic beasts, he was very composed, and that was a week ago, so he would have gotten over it by now. He was trained as a mercenary; if Professor Byleth wasn't able to shake things like this off, then he wouldn't have made it this far.

Did he and Captain Jeralt get into a fight? Edelgard chuckled. No it couldn't be that. Although she hadn't seen them interact much, she can tell the two were on good terms and care for each other.

Edelgard sighed. Perhaps he is just sick. Even the sturdiest of warriors fell sick every now and then. He was no exception. But even then, she couldn't help but worry for him. How sick was he? Is it a simple cold? Was it life threatening? Did she need to get the doctor?

Edelgard shook her head. _'Snap out of it. Why are you so concerned about him? You may need to clash blades with him in future.' _Yet, the cold truth stung like a needle. She didn't want that at all. Ever since he began to teach the Black Eagles, Edelgard had became close to him, and couldn't help but think about him at times in her room. She wanted him close to him in the future, no matter what, even if it wasn't possible. No, she needed him.

_'Stop. Just stop.' _Edelgard didn't want these thoughts. It was as though she was in lo-

Nope. She wasn't going to finish that thought. It brought too much weight to her. She closed her eyes and took deep breaths. "Just relax… No need to panic… He is simply sick… No need to worry for him…"

"Edelgard!" Usually Edelgard would wince at that voice, due to Ferdinands one-sided rivalry. However, she welcomed it this time. She needed to focus attention elsewhere. Besides she needed to blow off some steam.

"You looked stressed out. Please, come join Marianne and I for tea. We have more than enough for three people, since I usually invite more to join anyway." Edelgard opened her eyes; not the fastest she's ever done, but fast enough to personify her shock. Sure enough, she was sitting on a bench in the tea garden, with Ferdinand and Marianne, one of the first non-original recruits of the Black Eagles, sitting at a nearby table. That wasn't what surprised her; she didn't care much for the two's private life. What surprised her was Ferdinand being NICE to her. Not just any kind of nice; the kind of nice you would get from a dear friend.

_'This is a sign,' _Edelgard thought. _'A sign that everything is going wrong today, and that the Professor is not okay to the furthest extreme.' _She couldn't help it; she had to figure out what was wrong with the Professor, even if it meant breaking down his door. "I'm sorry Ferdinand, but I must be going somewhere. Thank you anyway."

And Edelgard gathered her things and walked off. Or enough to be considered a walk; in reality, she was tempted to get to her teachers door in a full on sprint. _'Please be okay my teacher. And please don't let this be a way for me to just see him.' _

…

Ferdinand could only watch in amazement at how fast she walked away. "Hmph. I wonder where her business takes her too."

Marianne, looking in the direction her new house leader walked off too, was rather amazed by her speed. And nervous with being alone with Ferdinand. "We shouldn't really be privy to her own affairs though, right?" Ferdinand sighed. "I suppose you are right." Ferdinand grabbed the tea kettle and began to pour the tea into the cups he had grabbed. "Ever since the morning had started though, Edelgard had begun to act more fidgety and distressed. She barely ate her breakfast. And, I, knowing that a distressed leader is not effective in and out of battle, had merely tried to sate her soul. And even that didn't work."

"Maybe because you always try to best her." Ferdinand sighed. "That is true. But what can be so important to cause her this much trouble."

Marianne took a sip of her tea, thinking on it for a little bit. "... Maybe she's worried for the Professor." Ferdinand almost spat out the tea in his mouth; luckily, his noble upbringing had prepared him such situations, and he could only look at Marianne in bewilderment. Marianne, however, did not appreciate the sentiment. "Oh, I'm sorry if I said something wrong. Please forgive me, I'm not great at-"

"No, Marianne. It's not that. Please elaborate on what you said." Marianne took a deep breath. "It just… Lady Edelgard seems to be much more closer to the Professor, she, um, appreciates his help more than us, and, um, looks at him differently than others." Ferdinand contemplated what she had.

Marianne was right. Even though Edelgard had her doubts before the mock battle, the minute it was over, Edelgard was attached to the professors side, praising his teaching, his strategies in battle, his combat prowess, and his selflessness. And of the few times he has paid attention to the two in the same room, she did have an intense focus on him, like a stone collector admiring his prime jewel. "I must agree with you on that. Edelgard is much closer to the Professor than any of us."

But why? Why was Edelgard so close? It didn't add up in his head; she was always so distant to others, so why did she give special treatment to him? _'Could it be… No, even Edelgard knows the consequences of that.' _"On that note though, you have done well to understand your classmate Marianne." Marianne jumped a little at that comment. "R-r-really?"

Ferdinand smiled. "Yes. Usually, you don't understand others that well, let alone your classmates. Yet, here you are, unraveling Edelgard, one of the toughest understand." Marianne blushed a little. "I-i-it was just a fluke. I still can't understand others that well. That was the only thing I got." Ferdinand chuckled. "Relax Marianne. You are making progress on building some more confidence. I'm proud of you for that."

Marianne nodded. "Thank you. Oh, and Ferdinand?"

"Yes?"

"I don't understand some of the things Caspar says and does, such as insulting your hair. Can explain why to me?"

"... What the hell did he say about my hair?"

…

"Professor?" Edelgard knocked on the door again. "Professor, it's me, Edelgard. I just want to check on you." No response. Edelgard sighed. She tried opening the door, expecting it to be locked. Except it wasn't, letting your get a glimpse of his room.

Or what should look like one. Usually, Professor Byleth's room would be tight, but organized; books would be on the floor in neat piles, ditched lesson plans in one corner, his armor and equipment in the other, while his coat would be on the chair, with his sleepwear or uniform in a neat pile. Instead, the books covered the floor, lesson plans scattered throughout the room, from the bed to the desk, and his clothes and coat were everywhere.

However, one thing Edelgard could confirm though, was that Professor Byleth was still here, alive. In his bed. In his night clothes. Staring at the ceiling. As Edelgard got closer, she could see what kind of mess he was in. His hair disheveled, his eyes were red, with bags under him, and his face look like he experienced a traumatizing event, which surprised Edelgard the most; the Professor's face was almost always stone faced. The fact this was the face he had surprised her the most.

"Professor?"

"Oh, hello Edelgard. Sorry that I can't help everyone today. I'm busy recovering right now." Edelgard winced at his tone of voice; it was even more deadpan than usual, yet also on the verge of breaking down any minute. "Professor, are you sick?" He shrugged. "That's one way of putting it." Edelgard could tell he didn't show any symptoms associated with sickness, yet why was he in this state?

"Professor, what happened to you then?" He shook his head. "I don't think that's a great idea. I don't want to trouble you and the others. Also, you may need to tell Seteth that I may need to take the week off to just think about my life decisions."

… That was an unexpected response. Whatever happened to him, the Professor was obviously terrified of what happened, even if his face (mostly) didn't give it away. "Come Professor, you must tell me so I can help. Please? You listened to me when I needed to talk to you about my past. I revealed things that I have kept to myself for years. Why can't I do the same for you?"

Although it didn't seem like it, Edelgard could tell her Professor was giving thought to what she had said. "... Very well. However, if you need me to stop at any point, let me know."

"Understood."

"Also, don't tell the others. I don't want the others to know about this."

Edelgard gave a soft smile. "It is only fair."

Byleth sighed. "Alright. Very well." Byleth swallowed hard. "I usually pride myself as someone who would gladly help others with nearly anything. But last night," He gulped. "Tested me so much, that I have to wonder what to it."

Edelgard sighed. "Professor, I assure you, everyone appreciates your help, and there is-"

"I went on a date with Manuela."

… Oh.

Oh no.

Oh nononononononononono.

OH NO.

"... You did what?"

"I just felt bad for her, so I offered her a date to make her feel better." Edelgard could only stare at him in disbelief. Even HE should not be so naive enough to know that Manuela's relationships ended at an incredible speed for a reason. And he went with it anyway.

It wasn't the only feeling though. There was an unrecognizable feeling rising in her, but even she could deduce what it was; jealousy. Why she was made-

Oh no. It can't be. It just can't. But even Edelgard couldn't deny any of the facts against her.

She was hopelessly in love with Byleth. Byleth, who is a teacher, which is very much so taboo. Byleth, who made the stupid decision to spend a night with Manuela, who was lucky enough to able to have a date with him. But no matter how many times Edelgard tried to dismiss it, the truth kept coming back to her.

'_Calm down. Think of this as another obstacle on your bloody path. One that doesn't fit in it at all, one that is just a little dream that may never come to reality, but nevertheless.'_

"...Continue."

Byleth took a deep breath. "We had decided to go to a restaurant in the town to have dinner. Manuela had picked it out."

'_It better not have been what I think it is.'_

"What I was not aware of was their large assortment of some of the strongest alcoholic drinks known to the history of man."

It was no secret that Manuela was a heavy drinker, being rivaled only by Captain Jeralt. So the fact that they went there wasn't surprising; it's that she took Professor Byleth with her, who was naive to the situation before him, and, Edelgard would bet, that he wasn't exactly a heavy drinker, leaving suspecticle.

"Dinner was alright, I suppose. The food was good, the service was good, not much to complain about. Except Manuela had mixed 2 kinds of drinks with Imperial Tequila."

'_Oh gods, she was drunk out of her mind.' _Imperial Tequila was known for its strength, with only the strongest of people would be able to handle. Even Captain Jeralt stayed away from it. Yet, for some reason, it was in high demand, with several noble houses, including House Aegir, owning distilleries to make large amounts of money off of it.

"So communicating with her was out of the question. She kept complaining about how Hannenmon always berated her, how men had always dumped her or rejected her, and how, because she led the Golden Deer house, she was responsible for every one of Claude's schemes. Thank the goddess we were in a public facility, or she would have taken that even further."

Edelgard was also having choice words for the goddess right now. _'Why? Why do you do this to me? Is this my punishment for being the Flame Emperor? Is this a trial I must overcome?' _

"Afterwards, I had to help Manuela to her room. She was not able to get there by herself, and it would have caused more trouble than not to leave her by herself. Even the Gatekeeper shuddered at what he saw."

Edelgard could see it in her brain. The Professor, with one of Manuela's arms over his shoulder, practically dragging her through town and the monastery, with people giving them curious looks, and Manuela's drunken talk not helping the situation one bit. And worse of all, the poor Gatekeeper, having to see what happened.

"Well, at least it wa- "

"When we got inside her room, she pinned me against the wall- "

'_... What? No, no, no , no…'_

"- and asked me if I was ready." Edelgard gave him a shocked look. "That's… unfortunate." Her face, words, and one half of her brain truly felt sorry and concerned with him. The other half of her brain? _'I wonder if the Death Knight would execute me if I told him to? Seems like he can do the job.' _

It was no secret that Manuela's luck with men was so much better before coming to the academy, and it looked like her previous date was the last straw, and Professor Byleth was just unfortunate enough to get involved when she couldn't handle it anymore. Edelgard, however, also knew for a fact that the Professor was… well, socially awkward, and was probably not told how the act of… intense intimacy would play out.

"I told her I was not ready. That our relationship wasn't like that. That I didn't have any experience, let alone a clue, on what to do. She said, and I quote, 'Don't worry. I will be the teacher now so just relax.'"

The fact that Professor Byleth even tried to mimic her voice made that last part so much more terrifying than it should have been. '_Please let this be over.' _

"Somehow, I managed to wrestle her off, and I ran away from her room so fast, faster than I ever had. Once I got here, my brain started to not function right. And that's why I'm here, staring at the ceiling, thinking about the decisions I've made to lead to that."

To say she was dumbfounded would be an understatement. Edelgard had just heard a rather unfortunate story. "Well… Professor, you did agree to go on a date with her in the first place."

"Yes that's true. But that made me wonder; should I not help others to prevent something like that?"

… Was it really that bad? Was he that shaken up over it? "Professor, one thing like that should not determine that. You've told me yourself that we should not be stuck in the past, that we must look forward to the future. One good deed gone wrong does not mean that another deed will end up like that. You must remain firm in your beliefs."

Edelgard grabbed his hand and squeezed. She started at his face, as conveying that her wishes, that he needed to pull himself together from… a can of worms he should have not gotten himself involved with. After a few minutes, Byleth gave a soft smile; a rare occurrence. "Your right. I'm just being childish at this point. I will be out there in a little bit. Just let clean this room up."

Edelgard smiled. "That's the Professor I know." As Edelgard turned to leave to her own time, "Oh and Edelgard." Edelgard turned towards her teacher as she was opening the door. "... Thank you for helping." Edelgard felt her cheeks heat up almost immediately. "Your welcome." As Edelgard close the door, she stared at the monastery before her. She hoped there wasn't a time where something like this was going to happen again, where she needed to be the shoulder for him.

"Um, Edie?" Edelgard turned towards the direction of the voice, only to find Dorothea there. "Oh, Dorothea, what brings you here?"

"Well, I was going to tell you that Caspar is in the infirmary now, but seeing as how you just walked outside of the Professor's room…" Dorothea gave a devious little smile.

"I-i-it's nothing like that!"

"Oh suuurrree it isn't~"

Edelgard sighed at her friend's teasing. "How about we just visit Caspar real quick?" And as Edelgard and Dorothea walked toward the infirmary, the Adrestian Princess never stop hearing her friends teasing. And likely never will.

**Alright guys there is that. Will I update the other stories I have? Will I make more one shots like these? Only time (a lot of it) will tell.**

**Until next time.**


	2. Chapter 2

**In which I torture Seteth**

** I thought it was just going to be a oneshot, but then I had this idea. Enjoy as we see how our residential quest giver is treated with this story.**

** Also, if you guys want to see some more oneshots from me, or some small extensions to this little thing, then do say so in the reviews.**

** Disclaimer: I don't own Fire Emblem. If I did, then I wouldn't have to deal with the Three Houses music being taken down constantly.**

Seteth could only rub his forehead at the situation present. Caspar, in the infirmary, sustaining multiple injuries from Ferdinand. Weapon used? His fists. Reason why? Honestly, Seteth didn't want to know, nor did he really care at this.

Not after Professor Byleth had said he wouldn't be available today, with no expalnation, causing panic and hysteria among the students, particularly those from the Black Eagles. Luckily, Seteth and Alois had managed to calm all but Edelgard down, but that was to honestly be expected.

Not after finding Mercedes and Annette running the infirmary instead of Professor Manuela on request of Professor Hannemon. While the two were very proficient in the manners of running the facility - particular Mercedes with her aptitude for Faith magic- in the most efficient way possible, finding Manuela not there was most peculiar, and having students run the facility would surely not look good to Lady Rhea.

Not after visiting Professor Hannemon to question why he requested such a thing, only to find that Manuela was suffering from a hangover yet again, prompting Seteth to slam his head against the wall, and ask himself HOW she was still a professor at the Officer's Academy.

ESPECIALLY not after Flayn accusing him that he was getting in the way of her making friends here, which was proposturius beyond belief.

And so, Seteth found himself in front of the room belonging to Manuela. He sighed. Many times he's had to come in here to lecture Manuela on her behavior, each giving him a headache afterwards. Seteth knocked on the door. He could hear a groan on the other side. He knocked again. If he remembered correctly, it usually took three tries for her to open up.

No response. Only a groan. He knocked a third time. And sure enough, he found the door open, with a mess of a person, holding a wet towel to her head. "I swear this bet- Oh, it's you Seteth."

"I think we've been through this enough times to know how this will play out, so I will let myself in." Manuela groaned as he walked in. "As much as I love our chit chats Seteth, I am not really in the mood for one today."

"You mean to tell me you are ever in the mood for them? Rather flattering if I do say so myself, but -" Next thing he knew, Manuela had thrown her towel had him. "Not now Seteth! Last night was horrible! I thought my date would have finally been my lucky break, but instead I get rejected even harsher than before."

Seteth sighed. "Must I listen to another of your ramblings?" Manuela sighed in exasperation. "What is wrong with me Seteth? Why will no man accept me? Why even Professor Byleth would die on the battlefield than marry me."

"The Professor? What does he have to do with anything?"

"Oh, he was my date last night." Suddenly, Seteth stopped thinking. He started at the wall like it was the greatest piece of art on display, ready for him to purchase.

"-teth? Hey Seteth? Are you listening?"

"... I'm sorry, did I hear you say that you went on a date with Professor Byleth?" Manuela gave him a questioning glance. "Yes. What's the big deal?" Seteth then put the pieces together. Professor Byleth was not taking a day off; he was recovering from the traumatic experience of going out with Manuela. Seteth didn't know what would happen if word of this got out; Jeralt killing Manuela for advancing on his son was a very likely possibility, but Rhea killing Seteth for allowing this to happen is just as likely of a prospect, given that Lady Rhea had an… 'exotic' fascination with the new Professor.

"... You are aware that the Professor took the day off?" Manuela gave a surprised look. "No I haven't. I was in my room the entire day, recovering from that jerk's rejection of me trying to give him a good time." Seteth just started at her like she was stupid. "... I wonder why."

"Well, I at least I can rant to someone about this."

"No, I'm not listening to you complain." Manuela sighed. "Fine I suppose. Although, all of this talk is making me wanting a drink. Or two. Or perhaps even more."

… So she was playing that game. "Very well. Please tell me how your waste of time went."

Manuela rolled her eyes at his comment, then proceeded with her story. "It started with my last date. The bastard that I had gone out with told me, through Professor Byleth, that he never wanted to see me again. The Professor saw how distracted I was, and then offered to go on a date with me, with him even letting me to choose where to go."

"... You didn't happen to go to the-"

"What do you think? Of course we did."

"Oh by the gods what is wrong with you?"

"Whatever, more like what is wrong with Byleth. He never had one drink, and he is Jeralt's son, who, by the way, still has tabs on his drinks. At least I have the decency to pay." Manuela rubbed her head. "Where was I… Oh yes! I had mixed some drinks together to try and liven up the spirit-"

"What kind?"

"Imperial Tequila mixed in with at least two other strong beverages."

Seteth slammed his head against the wall. "How are you a teacher again?"

"Because I have an incredible amount of talent in various things."

"How is your liver still functioning?" Manuela shrugged. "Hannenmon is still trying to figure that out. Anyway, we left the restaurant, and, oh my goodness was I drunk."

Seteth shook his head. "Wow, who knew you could get drunk from drinking too much alcohol." Manuela sighed. "Jeesh, aren't you in a lovely mood today. Anway, Professor Byleth was so kind to escort me to my room last night, and call it a night. But me, being the generous lady I am, offered him a night of 'fun', if you catch my drift."

Seteth started at her with a dumbfounded look. He was dead. Rhea needed all of the teachers she could get at the academy, so Manuela was safe. Him? She could find a new advisor. Jeralt was back, so that would work well for her, after Jeralt kills him after finding out that Manuela had just tried to seduce Byleth. All with Rhea's consent of course.

"... Why? Just why?"

"Because I couldn't let that date end on such a flat note. Also, what woman wouldn't want to be with such a handsome and strong young man?"

Maybe this was why Jeralt raised his son so oddly; it wasn't a secret that Professor Byleth was… well, simply put, interesting. He had never heard of the Church of Seiros, rarely shows or expresses any emotions, and never showed any interest in pursuing a romantic relationship, while being oblivious to how others see him. However, given Manuela's personality, that might have been for the best.

"... I take it he ran off?"

Manuela sighed. "Yeah he did, while I was here, crying my eyes out on being an unlovable mess, drank some more, passed out drunk, and here I am, recovering from a hangover while complaining to you."

"... There are so many things wrong with you, you know that right?" Manuela sighed. "I kind of figured. Well, I suppose I should tell Hannenmon what happened so he won't keep asking questions ab-"

"NO! I mean, there is no reason to tell him, or anybody, about this." Seteth was desperate. His life was on the line. Not just that, but he needed to protect Flayn from people like Slyvain, so if it came to being a beggar, then a beggar he will be. "What? Why not, I me-" Manuela gave a smile. An evil one; one she makes when she has an idea that puts Seteth's sanity out of commision.

"Well, that would have been a good idea. I've been thinking about going on another date soon, but I don't have a man that would take me." Seteth eyes twitched. Being blackmailed is one of the worst things in all honesty. "Fine. I will go with you, but only-"

"If I don't speak a word. I understand. I'm going down to the infirmary. Just be prepared for all of this later Seteth." After gesturing to her herself, Manuela had left Seteth standing there, dumbfounded. "... And yet another reason to not like that Professor."

**Boom, done. Now, I got a plan. We could:**

**Continue this with more stories structured like this (person A tells person B a story, leading to hilarity)**

**Since the DLC Loungewear outfits for Three Houses look more like basketball uniforms, we could have the most competitive basketball game in FE History.**

**Fun little oneshots of various pairings.**

** I would like to hear what you guys think, because… I mean, you guys are the ones reading it.**

** Till next time.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Tea. At night.**

**Yes: we are still on this thing. However, I got an entire list of ways we could extend this, so we are going to milk it while it's going strong.**

**Disclaimer: How I wished I owned Fire Emblem.**

Patrolling at night. One of Jeralt's least favorite things. Rhea insisted that Jeralt would do so to reassure students of their safety after the whole 'Flayn getting kidnapped' thing happened, saying that he was the one with the most chances of success at defeating the Death Knight in combat should he ever show up.

While he didn't want to get the archbishop angry if he refused, Jeralt thought it was obvious that the Death Knight would not come back to the monastery under these conditions. He was smarter than that. Aside from that, Jeralt could be doing better things right now, such as drinking, paperwork, or, better yet, sleeping. What is what he should be doing.

He was anyway almost done, waiting for the next man (the one that gets paid to do this) to take over. As he was finishing up at the Student Dormitories, he caught that a light was still on. While it shouldn't cause concern for most people, the light came from Byleth's room in the Student Dormitory. Rhea said that she wanted him to get better acquainted with the students, since he was close to their ages.

In all honesty though, it didn't make sense to Jeralt. Hannemon and Manuela's quirks are at least readable. Byleth is a blank slate; always has been, and will likely always will be. It's difficult for him to show emotion. He didn't catch on to things people said. And he sure as hell doesn't understand social norms.

Jeralt sighed. He might as well check on Byleth while he was awake. That way, he can help with whatever is bothering him. Also, no need to knock, not like Byleth was expecting anyone. As he opened and walked in-

'_... Well this is an interesting scene.' _Jeralt looked at what was before him, dumbfounded. His son was sitting at a table he pulled out, with tea and cake, and a girl that had just stopped stuffing her face full of it the minute Jeralt walked.

Jeralt let that sink in to him. A girl was in his son's room.

A GIRL was in BYLETH'S room. At NIGHT. With no one else around.

And not just any girl mind you; no, it was the future Emperor of the Adrestian Empire herself.

"... Uh…" Jeralt was still trying to process this. His son had a girl in his room at night. When the hell did this happen? When did his son learn how the hell love works? When the hell did he start to actually become socially aware? When did he learn about the 'birds and the bees'? How long has this been going for? Jeralt was pretty sure that he would rather die before having grandchildren at this point. And why the hell is no one speaking?

"Oh, hello Father. Would you like some cakes? I managed to get some from the kitchen at this hour, so the-"

It wasn't Byleth that freaked out first. Which was to be expected. It was the Princess. "Sir Eisner please don't get the wrong idea! It's not what it looks like! The Professor had merely invited me to have tea and cake-"

"She was having nightmares again." The future Emperor twitched at that sentence. From what Jeralt could tell, that was something she didn't want to be heard by anyone else. "Y-y-yes that is true, but-"

"Edelgard gets them frequently, so I stand outside her room until gets them so I can help calm her down."

"Professor, you don't nee- wait, what was that other part?"

Jeralt look at his son, pondering what he just heard. Byleth was always weird, but this was a whole new weird. Given though, he really cares for the brats, so he can only express that in 'Byleth' terms. "... Okay, so some information I didn't need to know."

"This time, I thought I could help her calm down in a better way if she had some of her favorite tea and sweets."

"... Okay, I think I get it."

"I assure you, there is nothing inappropriate going on. This is just, um, business. Yes, business! This isn't even my favorite tea!"

"Yes it is. It's Bergamot. I made sure of it when I made it. You always ask for it when we have tea on my free days, you always have one cup at dinner, and I make sure to always have some in stock for you."

Yep. A little creepy to most, but considering this is Byleth, it's about as far to 'normal' anyone will get to.

"I don't ev-even like sweets. I think th-"

"That's also false. After every meal, you have saghart and cream. After training, you have a trio of sweet buns, and when you study, you have cookies on reserve. Also, for desert, you always have the peach sorbert."

"That's bec-"

"Not to mention all of the sweets you have stashed in your room. I'm surprised Hubert hasn't found them yet."

"... Okay, kid, WAY too much. People will get the wrong idea." The Royal Highness' face could only get so red from Byelth's excessive information. "What wrong idea? I'm merely observing my student's likes and dislikes to better understand them." Jeralt sighed. "Yes, I understand. However, to others who don't understand they might find you a stalker."

Byleth pondered on that for a minute. "... I think I get it. But I don't understand why Edelgard is acting so unusual." _'Ironic coming from him.' _Edelgard sighed. "Professor, surely even you understand why I would act so out of tune. The implications of our current situation would look inappropriate to a passerby." Jeralt did not pity the noble; she got herself into this mess that is present. And on que, Byleth turned his head. "... What implications?"

The Imperial Princess stood there, a little surprised by her teacher's response. Jeralt chuckled a bit; it's been awhile since he'd last seen one of these scenes play out, and he would be lying if he said he hadn't missed them. "Well, the fact we are in your bedroom, at night, with nothing but low lit candles providing light, and tea and sweets made."

"... I don't see the problem." Her Royal Highness looked at Jeralt, who was trying hard to not have a laugh at this, as if asking what exactly did Byleth know. Jeralt shrugged; he sometimes wondered what went wrong, but then he just assumed it was because he was so focused on his job as a mercenary. "Well, Professor, um, a couple, as in, one that is in love with each other, would usually stay up at night in conditions such as these, replacing the tea with fine wine. And they would…" Edelgard turned beat red. Jeralt let a few laughs slip at that moment; she didn't have the heart to tell his son!

"... They would sleep together. Correct?" Edelgard sighed. "Yes, but… They would go even further. They would… perform sexual intercourse." Jeralt couldn't help it; he burst out laughing at this. Byleth had just learned about the 'birds and the bees', and he didn't even have to tell him himself!

"Ah. I suppose that makes sense."

… Huh. His reaction was a little disappointing. Granted, he knew about the scientific form of explanation, but he didn't know about the 'full picture' so to speak. So, in the end, the effect was mitigated.

"I suppose that was what Manuela was planning on doing to me that night after our date." Jeralt stared at his son, as did Edelgard. What did he just say?

"What do you mean 'you suppose'? Are you trying to tell me that wasn't what you thought was happening?!"

"No. I interpreted it differently. I thought she was trying to goad me into making me an assistant to her in the infirmary. And I told her that was not the relationship I wanted; I preferred being fellow teachers instead of medics."

… Manuela tried to sleep with Byleth?

"What?! Then, why were you in your room the entire time sulking?!"

"I knew running the infirmary is important, but that would have hampered my time helping my students. I was conflicted on a reasonable duty versus my own selfish desires."

… Manuela tried to sleep with Byleth?!

"But that was not what it was! She was trying to have sex with you! Even I, who merely heard the story, knew what she wanted."

"And I now understand that. Thank you for clearing this up Edelgard."

… MANUELA TRIED TO SLEEP WITH BYLETH?!

"Professor, honestly, your lack of social awareness exasperates me. But I suppose that's what makes you… well, you. Please try to read the situation more effectively next time."

"I will heed your word Edelgard. I don't know if I could have done this without you."

… You know what, Jeralt was just going to drink on this one.

"Can you people stop yelling?! I can hear you on the way back from the library."

Jeralt looked at the doorway, and saw the amusement of many of the knights here. Not that the little 'Magic Monster', as some of the knights called her, was the target of their teasing; rather, they loved to watch Claude run away after angering her, with several a soldier making gold off of bets alone.

Edelgard had also looked at the source of the newfound member of the conversation. "Ah, Lysithea. I apologize. Can I make it up with some cake?" The 'Magic Monster' looked at the table. "... Well, they DO look tasty…" After giving it some thought, she went to the table and grabbed some cake.

Jeralt ran the numbers through his head. Two girls, one boy, in a bedroom, at night. "... You know what, I'm going to leave you three to yourselves. I know nothing wrong will happen, given who're talking about here, so just keep quiet and go to bed later." As Jeralt left and closed the door behind him, he sighed into the sky above him.

Definitely three or four drinks at the bar. Of course, he would need to drag Alois with him to pay the tab. And he would visit Seteth tomorrow.

…

Edelgard's face turned a little red at hearing Jeralt's comment as he walked out. "So, what was that all about?" Edelgard looked at Lysithea, who was stuffing her face full of cake. The sweet, delicious, cake… Focus Edelgard!

Before Edelgard could speak however, Byleth had spoken before hand. "Father had walked in while Edelgard and I were having tea. Apparently, it gives off the wrong idea at this time of night." Lysithea could only stare at him in confusion, and looked at Edelgard, her face showing her question as bright as day: _'Is he really being serious?' _Edelgard sighed. "At least you are now aware of these things Professor. Although, I will admit, I do wonder how you've managed to get by without knowing these types of things."

"I don't know. I guess they really aren't as necessary as making sure you don't have nightmares." Edelgard's face quickly turned red. He mentioned that particular bit of information when Jeralt was here, and now Lysithea, who was trying her best to hold a chuckle or two. "Professor, I appreciate you being helpful to me. Extremely helpful if I do say so myself. However, I would appreciate it if would not spout that piece of information to anyone, and keep this to ourselves."

"But I don't see the problem with that though. I help many students with their personal problems. For example, Lysithea is afraid of ghosts, so I frequently walk with her throughout the Monastery at night so she doesn't get too scared." Edelgard wished he had waited to say that, because now, she was helping Lysithea not choke from the cake in her mouth.

"Pr-pr-Professor, I thought we had agreed to not speak about that!" Edelgard sighed, patting her fellow ally's head, earning a red face from Lysithea. "I know, he tends to do this, but trust me; even if he goes a little too far, the Professor does this for our well-being."

"Speaking of well-being, I think you would be better in my class." Lysithea and Edelgard looked at Byleth, dumbstruck by how casually he had brought that up. She knew the Professor was interested in several of the other students; Marianne and, more recently, Ingrid had joined the class afterall, and while it would mean much to Edelgard for Lysithea to join (even if she knew they would be on opposing sides in the future), even she thought this was a bit sudden. "Really? Why bring that up?"

"From what I know, you are very skilled at magic, and are one of the best students here due to your hard-work and dedication. The Black Eagle house, even before Marianne joined, has the most magic focused students out of the three houses. The Golden Deer house had you and Marianne, who had left. I believe that with you there, you can get the most out of your studies, due to a suitable environment for you."

Lysithea nodded. "Agreed. Continue"

"Also, it would help with personal connections. I don't really want Marianne feeling so lonely in the class, so with you there, I think she will feel a bit more comfortable. Also, I noticed that you and Edelgard get along with each other more than your own classmates, so I think this can help with opening up."

Edelgard looked at Lysithea, who in turn looked at her. Edelgard couldn't deny what the Professor had said; the two tended to be more honest with each other than with others. Edelgard felt it was like a sisterly-bond, something she had yearned for and missed after all of these years. And she would cherish this short lasting bond for as long as she could.

Lysithea turned towards the stoic Professor, who was sipping tea. "I see all of your points as very valid. However, as much as I would like to join, I simply cannot right now. The Battle of the Eagle and Lion is approaching next month, and if I would leave my current house, I would be looked at as picking the winning side instead of giving my all, considering me joining would ensure victory." Edelgard, while disheartened, could understand where Lysithea was coming from; as someone who was very devoted to perfecting her skills, Lysithea would want to prove herself instead of playing a lesser part.

Byleth sighed. "Really? Even if I threw in a guaranteed supply of sweets every month like I do with Edelgard?" Even if it was a bit embarrassing, Edelgard couldn't deny that the monthly supply, combined with the secret-stash-of-sweets-that-may-or-may-not-exist, truly make it feel like heaven can be obtained. "Re-real- No! Control yourself Lysithea. I'm sorry but I still can't."

Edelgard then thought of something. "Well then, I have a proposition, if you will hear me out Lysithea." Lysithea pondered on it for a moment. "Alright; humor me." Edelgard smiled, all while her Professor was curious to how this would go. "This one concerns the Battle of the Eagle and Lion. If you join us, I will guarantee you something that you can't turn down." Lysithea scoffed. "Really? What can be worth more than my pride."

"Claude."

Lysithea and Byleth both froze. Edelgard gave a brighter smile, glad at her accomplishment. _'Checkmate.' _While the two respected each other, Lysithea and her current house leader were always on bad terms. So to the surprise of no one was it no secret at the Monastery that one of Claude von Riegen's favorite ways to get amusement was to push every single one of Lysithea's buttons, calling her a child, treating her like a child, and generally, while giving credit to her, tends to not trust her enough to entrust her with bigger duties. Something that Edelgard could capitalize on.

"... So you're saying that if I join the Black Eagles house, then I-"

"Will be given the responsibility to defeat Claude at the Battle of the Eagle and Lion. Additionally, I will entrust you to help lead a section of the house to face the Golden Deer house, while I would handle the Blue Lions." Byleth raised an eye to Edelgard, but she couldn't blame him; she was giving much trust to Lysithea.

But that was the key; the additional responsibility shows one's talents.

"... I accept these terms, seeing as I get to beat Claude at his own game, along with the benefits of joining." Edelgard smiled, and she can see her Professor soften up a bit. "Well then Lysithea, welcome to the Black Eagles." She handed a plate of cake to her newfound member, who happily accepted.

As time flew by, Edelgard laid on her bed in her room after they had retired for the night. She would never be on the same side as them when all hell broke out.

But she wanted these moments. To keep them. To let her know that her life was not one of pain and suffering, but that it had moments that allowed her to live free.

She would cherish every last moment.

**Sorry to end this one on a downer note, but I thought it felt a little appropriate. **

**This one might be the longest chapter, but there will be more to come, so let's see if we can break a record.**

**Also, I have the next chapter planned: Claude von Riegan's Bizzare Adventure.**

**Until next time.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Claude von Riegen's Bizzare Adventure**

**Enjoy seeing a chapter in which we see an… interesting take on the Battle of Eagle and Lion. Or the lead up. And the aftermath.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Fire Emblem. Or Claude.**

Edelgard smiled over the sight before her. The Black Eagle flag had been raised for their assured victory in the Battle of the Eagle and Lion. Proof of her future victories in the name of her ideals. Standing with her Professor, she turned towards him with triumph written all over her. "We have won the day, thanks to your guidance Professor."

"I wouldn't necessarily say it was all me. The class did the most work; I'm proud of that. Especially you Edelgard; I thank you." Edelgard blushed a little, even if it was a little true.

"Edelgard. Professor." Edelgard turned around to meet with Dimitri, who was walking the two. "That was a spectacular battle. You both fought exceptionally well." Edelgard smiled softly. A little praise every now and then from her peers isn't a bad thing.

"Spectacular battle my ass." Edelgard looked towards the source of the new voice, who was undoubtedly Claude, so she can berate him for being a sore loser (something she was guilty of, admittedly).

Only he was in bandages. And a cast. And crutches. "... What happened to you?"

"Indeed Claude. What exactly happened to have you in such a condition?"

Claude looked at Edelgard, with fear and anger in his eyes. "Don't tell me you don't know princess. You just had to sick that demon on me?"

Demon? "... Lysithea?"

"Don't say her name!" Claude looked around hurriedly. "... Okay, she's not here. That's good." Dimitri, worried for his fellow house leader, was honestly dumbstruck. "Aren't you being a little too paranoid?"

"You don't understand. I had the perfect plan to make sure she wouldn't come near me at all. I don't know how, but she managed to still pull a Dark Spikes spell on me. I don't even think she's done yet. I teased a lot; she's out to get me now."

Edelgard sighed. "Claude, can you explain what happened exactly?"

"... Alright, so it started last week, when I was being as innocent as possible…"

Claude looked around real quick. "Huh, usually Hilda's around when I tell stories. She does this cool thing with a harp, and I think it really-"

"Claude!"

"Alright. Jeesh. Anyway, it started last week, when I was being as innocent as possible…"

…

"999, and 1,000 gold coins. Man, wait until that knight goes to the infirmary. Though I'm a little hungry now." Claude pocketed the gold, received after selling a pastry to a knight, with said pastry lined with his latest trick. Hopefully, it won't kill him. If it does… Well, at least Claude has something for Lorenz.

Seeing Hilda at the dining hall reading a letter, as he entered in, he decided to sit next to her. "How's it going Hilda? Reading another letter from Holst?" That's when Claude noticed her face; it was one of dread at what she saw before her. "... I take it that Holst ate another bad mushroom?"

"The letter is for you." Claude raised his eyebrow. "Really? Reading through my mail now? Jeesh, if you were that bored, then why don't you help Ignautz with something, or tell off Lorenz?"

"It's from Lysithea." Claude whistled. "Lysithea? Really? After she left the Golden Deer? Oh boy, is she asking to join back in? I will gladly accept her offer, of course, for that extra teasing time that I'm missing in my everyday life now."

"You might want to read it." Claude took the letter from Hilda, and started reading aloud to her. " 'Dear Claude, I write to you as a warning', oh that's funny. 'I am aware that you know that I had recently joined Edelgard and the Black Eagles. I have not fully explained my reasoning for joining the house. The first reason is that the Black Eagles have a better magic oriented curriculum for students focusing on magic, and provides a better environment for those studies, unlike someone who does not have any experience whatsoever, and disrupts my study time with useless quips.' Ok, she did not have to make that com-"

Hilda sighed. "Just finish the letter." Claude shrugged at his friend's sternness, which was weird to him. " 'The second reason is the promise of'..." Claude took a look at making sure it said what it said. "'Defeating you at the Battle of the Eagle and Lion. Edelgard and Professor Byleth have given me the responsibility to make sure that you are soundly defeated at the Battle. And they have given me the resources to make sure you are defeated. For all of the times you teased me, and wasted my time, I will make it HURT. Your ass is grass, and I'm chopping it. Sincerely, Lysithea'" Claude put the letter down, and looked up, only to see a worried Raphael in front of him. "Is this the wrong time to mention that Lysithea has been practicing magic on dummies with your face on it?" Claude nodded. "... Yeah, I'm going to get some food." As Raphael walked away, Claude turned towards Hilda, who had the same horrified look on her face as him.

"So what are you going to do Claude?"

"Well, other than lock myself in my room for the next few days, I don't know. Lysithea has a new toy, and I don't know what it is." Even then though, Lysithea was still a mage, and mages were typically frail. He would have to have archers positioned around to make sure that they would get her without issue, and hope they would beat her before she gets to him. Even then though, Claude had terrific eyesight; there was no way Lysithea could pull off whatever she was planning.

…

"... And then she pulled off whatever she was planning. How the hell did she do it Edelgard?"

"... A magician never reveals their secrets. As such, I don't know how Lysithea did it." However, Professor Byleth shifted at that statement. '_Calm my teacher. He cannot know.' _As it turned out, Edelgard did know how Lysithea did it. Professor Byleth and Huber knew too. They were the ones that made it possible.

It all happened nearly two weeks ago, on a day that can only be described as painful.

…

"And as you see right here, this painting shows House Gloucester, bringing honor to the battlefield so that the Alliance may be birthed."

"Indeed my son. Remember, your Highness; House Gloucester is the greatest of all the houses in the Alliance."

They then laughed.

That laugh was driving her insane. Here she was, in Gloucester territory, at the Gloucester manor, where Lorenz and his father, Count Gloucester, were showing them all of House Gloucester's… artistic taste. Lysithea and her had done their best to hide their mental pain. The Professor, however, was probably the only one who was interested.

Edelgard had to calm down though, and focus on the mission; Thyrsus. Lysithea's crest was that of the Major Crest of Gloucester; if she managed to get the relic, then, if the legends were to be believed, her magical range would be increased, allowing her to safely take care of enemy forces and Claude. Normally, Edelgard was above stealing such things, even if it was from Duke Aegir.

Considering it was House Gloucester, however, no damage would be done. To be frank, while House Gloucester is on good terms with the Empire, the House was a headache to deal with. If it disappeared, no one would miss it. Lysithea was also not above taking the relic when she heard of it's magical prowess, claiming Lorenz was wasting potential by not focusing on magic. Even the Professor was okay with it, as Lorenz had been a frequent complaint by others on conduct, so he saw this as punishment.

Hubert was okay with it, only because he found it amusing.

Edelgard had to endure this just a little bit more though. Around the corner, she could see Hubert and the case containing Thyrsus. Edelgard tensed a little however; for some odd reason or another, Hubert was casually strolling through the halls of the estate, in this damn room, looking at every piece of 'art' possible, while loudly chewing into an apple.

'_... Is he trying to get us caught?!' _Hubert must realize that he was carrying a Hero's Relic with him. A Hero's Relic that they just stole from a noble house. Any loud distractions could cause Lorenz or his father to notice Hubert. But no, Hubert instead insisted on looking at the vase that was-

'_Actually that one looks nice.' _As if reading her mind, Hubert grabbed a sack out of Goddess knows where and put the vase in. Edelgard was about to explode; they were there for Thyrsus, not museum hunting.

Hubert then headed towards the main exit. Said exit was behind Edelgard and the others. '_IS HE MAD?!' _He was going to get caught. Edelgard was sure of it.

Yet he wasn't. As a matter of fact, he just walked right out. No one questioned him, no one looked at him; he simply just left with Thyrsus and a vase. Then Edelgard realized something; it was House Gloucester they were dealing with. Edelgard looked towards their hosts, and sure enough, they were enamored with their own egos.

'_... Why was I worried again?' _And she resumed listening to their damn laughter.

…

"... So Professor, how would you say that battle went? Rather difficult wasn't it?"

"I'm disappointed it was so easy." Edelgard had to hold back her laughter, because that was something she had expected to hear. Not just that though, but her Professor had just called their opponents child's play. "The Blue Lions had a formidable offense, but broke down easily the minute their Pegasus Knights fell, and the Golden Dear had no control over their main commanders, who were more than incompetant." Edelgard smiled at how the other two shifted at Professor Byleth's words; one of the reasons why they didn't simply recruit Lorenz was because of his recklessness, and he ended up costing Claude the victory. Meanwhile, the Blue Lions were easily tricked into a planned battalion attack, crippling them.

Claude sighed. "Fine we get it; you guys are better than us, woohoo. However, I propose a feast. A grand feast that will tear the walls between our houses, and bring us closer together." Edelgard gave him a questioning glance, which Dimitri was also giving him, meaning they had the same question; where would he get the food for a 'grand feast'? Claude gave a small chuckle in response. "... And by grand feast, I mean a perfectly normal feast in the dining hall."

Professor Byleth smiled. "I guess we will. The Black Eagles need to celebrate their victory somehow after all." Edelgard felt her face go red at his comment. "Professor, what has gotten into you? You're oddly exicatable right now." Edelgard noticed Dimitri wandering to the side. "Hm, seems like they are ready to leave right now."

Edelgard motioned for her Professor to follow, while Claude had Raphael pick him up. Edelgard was hoping their trip back was a bit smoother; for some reason, she kept hearing voices from the back of the carriage she and the Professor were in. Edelgard had come to terms that it was just her being nervous, not only for the battle, but being in such a close space with her Professor made her red.

…

All Byleth could say is he didn't know where the students got their energy. It was a mystery. As he saw all of the students gathered in the mess hall, Byleth was gathering some food up. He couldn't allow ALL of the students to miss out; especially those ones.

"Professor Byleth~" Byleth turned, only to see a very plastered Manuela making her way towards him. If Byleth had recalled correctly, Manuela was in this same kind of situation on their date. And Edelgard had mentioned that Manuela wanted to have a sexual experience with him, something he would have to decline. "Professor Manuela. What can I do for you?"

"Well, I was feeling very *hic* tired just now. Would you care to escort me to your room?" Byleth raised an eyebrow. "My room? Why is that?" Manuela walked closer to him, and Byleth couldn't help but notice how much looser her dress seemed. "Well, for starters, your class won the Battle of the Eagle and Lion. And right now, I'm up for giving said winner a 'prize'."

It took Byleth a minute to realize what she was talking about. "I'm very sorry Manuela, but I must refuse."

"Ah, are you su-"

"After all, I'm a little full on some food right now, and I'm not a heavy drinker, so I must decline one last meal with the faculty members. Now if you excuse me, I'm going to be heading to my room for the night." As Byleth walked away from his colleague (who admittedly looked dumbfounded by his declination, weirdly enough), he took one look at the mess hall before him. Ingrid was with Felix and Sylvain, chatting with her good friends. Petra was digging in to the meal before her, with Bernadetta scared for her life and Dorothea a little disgusted, as Mercedes and Annette were cooking Brigid styled foods. Linhardt being used as a makeshift table for Caspar and Raphael's arm wrestling competition, with Ignautz being judge and Dimitri watching amusingly. Claude and Hilda destroying the ego of Lorenz. Marianne making food for her taste tester Ferdinand as part as a way for Marianne to find herself.

And then there was Edelgard. Lysithea and her were playing with the cats that had wondered in, with Hubert eyeing them like an assassin in the waiting. Byleth smiled at his student's enjoyment; she was always so serious, so it was nice that she was being loose right now.

However, there are some things that were on Byleth's mind as he walked past his room; Constance's laugh and Balthus' stomach growling being a few of them.

**Ah yeah, that's right. We're bringing in the Ashen Wolves to the mayhem that is this story *that hasn't been updated in Gods know how long*. Look forward to it… Um, how not, with how inconsistent I am right?**

**Till next time!**


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